What is bullying?
- Unwelcome behaviour (criticism, nit-picking, fault-finding, exclusion, isolation, being shouted at, humiliated, excessive monitoring, verbal and written warnings imposed on you etc.)
- Persistent, offensive, abusive, Intimidating or Insulting behaviour which makes the recipient/victim feel upset, threatened, humiliated or vulnerable. This undermines their self confidence and may cause them to suffer and become stressed.
What is a bully?
A person who takes repeated hostile actions against another person and has more power than the person targeted.
3 Ways to bully
Verbal Bullying: Name calling, sexist remarks, racist remarks, verbal threats, and cruel jokes about appearance, physical ability or religion.
Relational Bullying: Being left out, gossiping, exclusion.
Physical Bullying: Is assault.
- Damaging property or possessions
- Throwing objects
Why do bullies bully?
- To avoid facing responsibility for their behaviour and the effect it has on others
- To diverts attention away from their inadequacy.
- To gets others to look up them, so they try to achieve this by acting tough
- Many boys, who have been bullies early in life, often continue their style of behaviour as adults. Then the police deal with bullies as criminals.
What to look for in a child who may be bullied
- Coming home with cuts and bruises
- Torn clothes
- Asking for stolen possessions to be replaced
- “Losing” dinner money
- Falling out with previously good friends
- Being moody and bad tempered
- Being quiet and withdrawn
- Wanting to avoid leaving the house
- Aggression with brothers and sisters
- Doing less well at schoolwork
If bullying continues
- Keep a diary of what your child says is happening or get your child to keep his/her own diary
- Write a note to the class teacher or principal, explaining that the problem is till unresolved
Ask what action has been taken on earlier bullying complaints. Schools have a variety of sanctions that can use.
- A warning
- Calling the bully's parents in to school
- Internal exclusion within school
- Fixed term exclusion
- Permanent exclusion
- You must talk to a teacher
- Work with the teachers to make schools safer and happier
- If you are not satisfied with the school's response, don't give up –other sources of help are available.
Dealing with Bullies
- Stand straight and tall if faced with a bully, look him/her in the eyes
- Be polite but firm and tell the bully “Stop if, I don't like it, Leave me alone”
- If at all possible don't cry or show you are upset, walk away
- Report what happened to an adult you trust, and expect action to be taken